11. Pet owl would attack computer mice and leave deposits on keyboards
10. Wand might misfire at annual meeting, killing shareholders
9. Invisibility cloak would hide him from users, management
8. He’d keep slapping servers and yelling “Repairum Serviosa!”
7. He’d replace data-center door with portrait of password-hungry fat lady
6. Flaming cauldron would set off fire-suppression system
5. He’d behave too much like a manager, waving wand and expecting results
4. He’d write all his command-line interfaces in Latin
3. He’d keep trying to link PC’s via floo network
2. Server-room Quidditch. ‘Nuff said
1. Would you leave a whiny teenager with identity issues alone in your data center?

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